Added Feb 2023: this website (https://www.care.com) claims to provide access to support workers: when you visit the site you're asked a few basic questions and then are presented some candidates you can choose from. There's a fee involved.
First and foremost, take the time to really think about both what qualities you are looking for in a worker and what responsibilities you want them to take on. You also need to consider the environment in which the worker will engage with your loved one, for example, if they will be going to the gym you probably want someone of the same gender as your loved one. Shared interests are also important, in order to have a positive experience for both. Over the years I've hired people with extensive training and experience and people who've never been a support worker in their life - it really depends on how vulnerable your loved one is. Ask for and check references.
Do one interview without your loved one present, to get a basic sense of the candidate, then do a follow-up interview with your loved one involved. You might also want to negotiate a series of shorter engagements while you assess everyone's comfort level. I ask workers to keep a notebook where they write down what they did and any questions or concerns.
In the old days, respisteservices.com was the best place to go to find a worker (see below), but it is much less active currently (2020). I have had success putting a classified ad in a local paper and posting ads at community centres. You might also be able to place ads at community colleges or universities. Ideally someone who lives in your general neighbourhood is good, not just because they will be familiar with the community but because you won't have to incur additional costs to pay for transportation (particularly during COVID where you might choose to pay for a worker to avoid public transit).
Here's the process I generally follow when looking for a worker through respiteservices.com (which, as of 2021, is not the resource it used to be):
I look at the "worker classified ads" on the respiteservices.com website and ask to get the profiles of anyone that seems like a possible candidate. I also ask them to do a search for me based on my criteria (area of the city where I live, hours and days I'm looking for). That gives me a pile of profiles to look
I go through the profiles looking for things that give me some clues as to how close each candidate comes to my wish list. I read over the description of what they've done and try to imagine how that might relate to what I want them to do. For me, I'm less interested in formal training (because I'm confident of my training abilities) but I do like to see signs they've got some creativity and initiative (because I'm not going to be handing them a program to deliver). Because my son has no medical issues I'm less interested in someone with extensive experience with people who have a physical disability, suspecting (unfairly, I'm sure) that they'll be overly protective of my son. I write notes on the profiles and group them: one pile for people I'm not interested in, one for people I am interested in (and because I'm way too organized, I usually put that pile in order from highly interested to not interested at all). I ask my husband to go through the resumes too: a second opinion is very valuableI send an email to the people I'm interested in. I make sure my message covers all the main points: the location, the hours, the pay, the things the worker is expected to do, the environment (e.g. we have a cat), and above all a profile of my son. I keep it short and positive - I want to be honest, but I also want to attract people to the job. I ask people to let me know if they are interested and to send me a resume if they are.
I keep notes on the responses for future reference, even if someone says they aren't available (you really can't rely on the details in the profiles - nobody ever seems to go back and update them when their situation changes). This is very helpful if you need to hire someone again (which you will, for sure) - it saves time to know what they said last time you contacted them.
I set up an interview with my top choices. I prepare a list of questions (sometimes with specific questions for specific people, if I want to learn more about some education they have, or a work experience). I ask for references. I have found it best to time the interviews for 30 - 45 minutes before my son arrives home from school (or for a time when he's out at a program but returning in 30 - 45 minutes) - that gives me a chance to focus on the candidate first without distractions and then observe how they interact with my son (or, worst case, wrap up the interview and send them on their way before he gets home). Like with the profiles, I'm listening and looking for the things on my wish list. It's easy to get side-tracked with interesting things they've done and forget that those might not be particular relevant to your situation. I encourage people to talk about their philosophies and their experiences. I try to assess whether they'll deal with me honestly (not just trying to give the answer they think they should). I get references - and I call them and ask some specific questions, if I can. The biggest thing I look for is how they respond to my son when they meet him and how he responds to them.
I follow up with people who I interviewed (I never tell them in the interview if I'm interested or not - I tell them I want them to take time to think about the opportunity while I think about whether they're a good fit). I make an offer. I don't make them sign a contract or anything - I haven't had anybody just not show up, and unless you plan to sue someone for breach of contract, there's not much use in having one. That said, I do put the requirements (time, payment, requirement to register with Passport or whatever entity you use for claiming worker-related costs) in writing.
You might suggest a trial period of a month, at the end of which you and the worker can both decide whether to continue. You need to discuss and set up any resources the worker will need (for example, I have the worker keep a log book, and I leave notes in it about chores that need to be done, favourite foods, reinforcers, etc.). You might want to establish a schedule for the worker to follow or leave things open, but in a new engagement it's easiest if you give the worker some concrete tasks to engage your loved one in. This is all very general advice, and your needs (and those of your loved one) will vary, but as a rule if you put in the work to find a good candidate, do a good job of explaining their responsibilities, involve you loved one in the decision, and do regularly check-ins, all should be well.
I go through the profiles looking for things that give me some clues as to how close each candidate comes to my wish list. I read over the description of what they've done and try to imagine how that might relate to what I want them to do. For me, I'm less interested in formal training (because I'm confident of my training abilities) but I do like to see signs they've got some creativity and initiative (because I'm not going to be handing them a program to deliver). Because my son has no medical issues I'm less interested in someone with extensive experience with people who have a physical disability, suspecting (unfairly, I'm sure) that they'll be overly protective of my son. I write notes on the profiles and group them: one pile for people I'm not interested in, one for people I am interested in (and because I'm way too organized, I usually put that pile in order from highly interested to not interested at all). I ask my husband to go through the resumes too: a second opinion is very valuableI send an email to the people I'm interested in. I make sure my message covers all the main points: the location, the hours, the pay, the things the worker is expected to do, the environment (e.g. we have a cat), and above all a profile of my son. I keep it short and positive - I want to be honest, but I also want to attract people to the job. I ask people to let me know if they are interested and to send me a resume if they are.
I keep notes on the responses for future reference, even if someone says they aren't available (you really can't rely on the details in the profiles - nobody ever seems to go back and update them when their situation changes). This is very helpful if you need to hire someone again (which you will, for sure) - it saves time to know what they said last time you contacted them.
I set up an interview with my top choices. I prepare a list of questions (sometimes with specific questions for specific people, if I want to learn more about some education they have, or a work experience). I ask for references. I have found it best to time the interviews for 30 - 45 minutes before my son arrives home from school (or for a time when he's out at a program but returning in 30 - 45 minutes) - that gives me a chance to focus on the candidate first without distractions and then observe how they interact with my son (or, worst case, wrap up the interview and send them on their way before he gets home). Like with the profiles, I'm listening and looking for the things on my wish list. It's easy to get side-tracked with interesting things they've done and forget that those might not be particular relevant to your situation. I encourage people to talk about their philosophies and their experiences. I try to assess whether they'll deal with me honestly (not just trying to give the answer they think they should). I get references - and I call them and ask some specific questions, if I can. The biggest thing I look for is how they respond to my son when they meet him and how he responds to them.
I follow up with people who I interviewed (I never tell them in the interview if I'm interested or not - I tell them I want them to take time to think about the opportunity while I think about whether they're a good fit). I make an offer. I don't make them sign a contract or anything - I haven't had anybody just not show up, and unless you plan to sue someone for breach of contract, there's not much use in having one. That said, I do put the requirements (time, payment, requirement to register with Passport or whatever entity you use for claiming worker-related costs) in writing.
You might suggest a trial period of a month, at the end of which you and the worker can both decide whether to continue. You need to discuss and set up any resources the worker will need (for example, I have the worker keep a log book, and I leave notes in it about chores that need to be done, favourite foods, reinforcers, etc.). You might want to establish a schedule for the worker to follow or leave things open, but in a new engagement it's easiest if you give the worker some concrete tasks to engage your loved one in.
It can be hard for a worker to establish a relationship with a child when a parent is right there, but it can be equally hard to leave a vulnerable person with someone new. Some people monitor the home with a camera, which I don't feel is appropriate. You might choose to work from home a few days when a new worker is there. Bottom line: if you don't trust the worker, don't hire them, and be prepared to drop one if there are any concerns or warning signs.
